Thursday, August 14, 2014

Meet my grandfather!

My grandfather (maternal) visited me yesterday on the sideline of my late great grandmother’s annual ceremony. I haven’t seen him for a very long time, as he wasn’t well to move out of his house or climbing down from his upstairs home. I was truly surprised when my grandma brings him home along with her. Since he was suffering from certain health setbacks in recent past, I didn’t expect him to visit me and for me it is hardly possible to meet him at his home in first floor and coming across their congested street in wheelchair is something quite awkward to image. Since it is hard to take a car inside their street and also post fracture last year, I am going through difficult times transferring between car and wheelchair.

My grandparents @ Kodaikanai, 2012
My grandfather and grandmother (shot at Kodaikanal in 2012)
I feel so happy meeting him and I really moved looking into his eyes that was yearning to see me… His affection and care for me is something very special and is always evident through his eyes. Though he won’t speak much and couldn’t make gestures easily, I understand him quite well and I can’t explain how much I love him and he means to me. He is our best well-wisher and what and where we are today is only because of his chief intention along with his son’s (my late uncle) hard work, and selfless being provided us so many advantages in life. Until he closed his teashop at early 20s, he has been a hard worker and active being.  For more than two decades he had been a cabs car and lorry driver, before started fulltime dairy business and opens the teashop.

My uncle’s demise in late 2001 had hit him immensely and shutting down the teashop, left him jobless at home resulted in greater drawback at health followed by a cardiac arrest due to clot in heart.  But in latter days he suffers from diabetic and nervous problem and the side effects of tablets forced him to quite depend on others. He could walk only at very slow pace and someone need to lift him from the chair to stand and being little obese it has been very difficult for my grandmother to take care of him. We ever expected him to become infirmity at this early age of 75, while older than him are progressing well. I am one of his main concerns to make him feel regret, and he had expressed his sorrow many time with granny for unable to help me in anyways.

In 2001 he used to drive me every day to a clinic in T.Nagar here, where I took Ayurveda treatment for nearly two months. Driving through the heavy morning traffic is a true venture in his way of driving, though he manages only because of the eagerness to see me as a normal being. While studying in school, he used to pick me in his bicycle if I received none.  Putting the bags on the handlebar, he pedals me to home placing me on the rear carrier, since my school was very close to their house. He had scolded me and also embraced at same, as he always had special attention towards me.

I think it is our turn to take care of him, not only because he had worn-out his life for our self but true love he has shown for others and as children/grandchildren it’s our duty to support not only physically but also make him feel happy and content. At my stand I am conscious not to disturb him anyways, but I feel sorry that indirectly I’m one of the main concerns on his drawback stream. Emotionally he has been disturbed by others, forgetting whatever he had done for them and just for the brief of ego and updating their fake statues - though they deserved to be so – makes him feel anguish. Until 2012 he had traveled with me for many places, as I love doing it so, I am helpless now leaving him at home as he finds it very difficult to travel and getting in and out of the car, and in case of urgency he prefers Auto (rickshaw) to pick and drop him at doorstep.  

17 comments:

TexWisGirl said...

what a special man he is to you and all of your family. bless him - and you. do not feel that you cause him pain and angst. he loves you.

Indrani said...

A noble man!
My best wishes to him.

Ramakrishnan said...

A very nice and heart warming post Jeevan. Reflects the great love affection and bonding grand father and grandson.God Bless you and your family. Happy Independence Day & Vande Mataram !

George said...

Thank you for introducing us to your grandfather. He sounds like a wonderful man, and I'm glad you were able to see him again.

L. D. said...

You writing of your grandfather is so good. I like capturing a picture of your family and life as you tell you life. I hope there is a way that you could get to be more mobile in the wheel chair.

Ponniyinselvan/karthikeyan(1981-2005 ) said...

Dear Jeevan,
very much moved and share my empathy .I know how hard it is to lose a son.On your birthday, when i came to your house i met your grandmother and was talking to her .She could not overcome the grief.convey my heartfelt regards to them.
karthik amma

Anonymous said...

Such a loving post!

Destination Infinity said...

It's good to see your grandfather, and to know how much he means to you. Do show as much gratitude as possible to him now. I think he is also lucky to have a grandson like you.

Destination Infinity

Betsy Banks Adams said...

Oh My---what a heart-moving post today. I can feel the emotion in your words when talking about this wonderful man. Thanks for introducing us to your adoring Grandfather. He obviously worked hard all of his life --and it is always hard to see our loved ones begin to get old.

As you know, George's Daddy lived to be 101 --and he worked so hard his entire life, until he couldn't do it anymore due to his age and health. Every time we would see him, I would cry when leaving since I loved him so much and hated to see him deteriorate like he did... SO---I know how hard it is for you to see your Grandfather not getting to do the things he used to do...

Hugs,
Betsy

ashok said...

lovely grandparents Jeevan...

Uppal said...

It is a great feeling to have such deep bonding with one's grandparents. Their love is so genuine and totally unconditional. Your post reminded me of my maternal grandparents whose lives exuded pure love and affection.

Anonymous said...

The care and love you and your grandfather have is evident in your writing. It is something you will have to cherish for the rest of your life. Though life is hard for both of you now, you have each other's love and respect and many in life are not granted that privilege.

Each of us need to live our lives and appreciate the good things that the Almighty has given us and not dwell on the hardships. I still remember a saying on a sign over my work bench for a job I had when I was only 14. I worked in a heavy metals industry and the sign read...." I had the blues because I had no shoes. Until upon the street, I saw a man who had no feet."

Lesson to be learned from that visionary statement.

SmokeySheye

Sandhya said...

Both of you are lucky to have each other, who love each other genuinely. All the best to you, Jeevan!

Jeevan said...

SmokeySheye - First, thank you for taking time to reveal my blog and for your nice thoughtful comment. What you said is sufficient of life and for the people in hardships, the less privileged are motivations to lead content with what we have... life isn't a technical app to compare which is best resource, and our life is constructed on self experience and knowledge that could ever be same as one another.

No way I could forget the times being with grandpa and those are treasures no one could snatch from me unless I lost memory. Obviously what I shared with my grandparents is not what interest many kids today, or there isn't opportunity provided to them... but I wish it is a phase that no one should miss, because there couldn't be people like grandparents who care and love wholeheartedly.

Divya Pillai said...

Very lovely blog,
From your blog its very clear that your grandpa is not in the list of the people who give up easily
So,I dont think that you are in your grandpaa's drawback stream
Plzz dont think in that way!!
You and your grandpaa are very lucky to have each other!!
TC

Jeevan said...

Divya - I ever thought my Flickr friends will comment in my blog, but you are second following Sheye.
Thank you and I really appreciate your comment and thought to reach my post here. I don’t say I am the only concern, but perhaps I’m one among the many. I wish he stays well as long as possible...

Priya said...

Grand parents are always special and best wishes to them..